Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The REAL 7 Signs of Aging

So it turns out I’m getting old.  Despite the grey hairs and crows feet being a dead giveaway, I’ve been blissfully cocooned in the mind of a 19 year old.  Underneath my sagging exterior, I’ve been jiving away to The Venga Boys and playing Snake on my mobile phone.  Hang on, did I just say “jiving”?  Confirmed.  I am getting old.

You see, I’ve recently decided to compete in a half-marathon.  I’ve always enjoyed running and have competed in several running events and triathlons.  I even challenged myself to competing in a full length triathlon when my first born was only eight months old.  Two babies and a few too many chocolate Magnums later though, and it’s not quite as easy.  I still get the same buzz when I’m in the zone.  Nothing else exists except the sweat on my back and the beat of the music on my Ipod.  Those occasions are becoming more few and far between and it seems I can’t walk to the letterbox without pulling a hamstring. 

Getting old can't be that bad
Facebook reminds me of my age every day.  My friends are having their birthdays, turning 32, 35, 38.  How did that happen?  My quadragenarian husband (like that one?) and I begin a Fiesta of Fortieths this weekend and I have to keep reminding myself these are my friends, not my Dad’s mates birthdays that we’re celebrating. 

I’m determined to persevere with my uphill run against the effects of age, but this enlightenment has led me to uncover the REAL 7 signs aging…

1.        You’ve recently developed a passion for drinking tea.  In fact you’re probably having “nice cuppa” right now.
2.       A typical Friday night now involves a block of Fruit & Nut and perving on the cute chippie from Better Homes & Gardens.
3.       You own more than one pair of slippers.
4.       You think modern music is too loud, too rude or too fast
5.       You’ve always got a tissue “handy”.  Most likely it’s in your bra.
6.       You have a gravitational pull towards clothes shopping at Katies.
7.       You can’t remember the last time you wore a G-String

How many more signs can you add to the list?

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